It’s somewhat amazing just how many people think that by writing an article on politics and posting it on the internet, this automatically makes the article an insightful and relevant treatise on realpolitik rather than a small pile of steaming Jesus shite.
There’s something about the feeling of pressing “submit” which seems to give them the impression that someone cares. *BEEP*. Wrong. Very few people write with enough wit and insight to actually stop an internet user in their clicks and make them think “Lol, what a read”. It takes more than saying “Yeah, wouldn’t it be rad if everyone could get along? And you know what, the people who are worse done by are the Muslims. Definitely”.
It take skill, it takes vigour, it take lots of fucking profanity and most importantly it takes balls. Well, it doesn’t really take balls but I was on a roll, you know?
So, you might be asking, what is this Dostoevsky of the internet going to poop down my network tonight? Something clever? You bet you favourite aunt I am.
Welcome yourself, because I’m too paraplegic to care, and sit yourself down by the monitor to read about….
If I ruled the world.
Part one, of many.
There’s something that pisses me off a lot. Well, there are a lot of things, truly. Dogs, lack of money and people expecting me to care are just three of them. But the one I’m going to expand upon and discuss today is- Private schools, and their gayness. In this text I will use “gay” as a substitute for words my currently stunted vocabulary fails to provide.
Why do private school piss me off? Well. Not because they are dens of sodomy and bum lovin’. They are, by the way. The latin motto of Eton is “Exspectata ut Eton. Iam , sinus super”. This is translated to “Welcome to Eton. Now, bend over”.
Not because they are all arrogant twats, either. I can deal with arrogant twats, mainly by annoying them until they try to have an argument with the obviously stupid commoner and then destroying whatever offence they put up, be it linguistic, physical or them trying to roger me.
No, it’s the premise itself.
The rich get better education. What the fuck is up with that.
Actually. Before I get ranting, let’s get something straight. My parents are pretty rich. I’m not a socialist, I’m not a communist. Nor am I particularly right wing. I just think that the world would be better if it was run with some common sense, rather than stupidity.
Back to the story. So, the rich people get to go to the best schools, and the poor people get a worse education. And it is a worse education, the poorest areas have the shittiest schools with the least money, and so can’t afford to pay the teachers enough money. Whereas the school that have money, that charge people £30,000 a term to send their sprogs away, can afford the best teachers and equipment, which means that less well off schools can’t.
And here’s the important bit- why should the rich people get better education because their parents are rich? A decent society would judge each member on their own merits, and this includes the kids. Some of the most moronic, violent thugs come from rich families.
Why should the rich children automatically have a better chance at achieveing their potential (or exceeding it, in some cases- I’ll get to that later) because they have the splendour of an Eton education?
One of the most annoying things, though is the “Old Boys” system. This is where people who went to the swanky schools, played such English sport as rugger, cricket and circle jerk together, help each other out. You know. A butler here. A few hundred there. A well paying job. There was another person with better qualifications, but hey, we know this guy. He’s a lad. Screw the other one.
How is this a good way to run a society? Abolish private schools, make everyone have to go through the same system and see what comes out the other end then. And I do mean the same system. None of this shitty “Each school works differently” crap. Bring back the old system, of three different types of school. Grammar, secondary modern and The Shit Heap (I can’t remember the name, that one’s good). Grammar, for the academic kids. Secondary modern for the not so academic. And Shit Heap for those who deserve it. That way we can guarantee that not only does each person realise their full potential, they aren’t held back by stupid gimps who think failing at life is fun. These bastards are off in the Shit Heap learning how to avoid being eaten by rats, which will hold them in good stead for their lives on the streets.
Posted by snafle 
